Michelle Kennedy Hogan

I have been reluctant to write about potty training because I don’t want people to think I think I’m some kind of expert. However, a lot of people seem to have trouble with this issue and ask me how I do it so quickly, so I thought I’d throw my “method” out there. Having just successfully trained little Hogan #6 – she is 2.5 years old – I guess my very ordinary method works OK with both boys and girls.

First, look for signs that your child is interested and ready. Allow him or her to accompany the same sex parent into the bathroom to see how it all works. I always explain everything I’m doing and why. I talk very matter of factly and use the proper words for body parts. Although we don’t use the word “urine” we use “pee.”
Next, we buy a potty chair and put it in the playroom or living room. It becomes just another piece of furniture. Sometimes we sit on it for fun. Sometimes we put dolls on it. Sometimes we don’t even notice it.

Read the rest here.

I am often asked how I get my kids to eat good food – especially when there are so many of them! Well, it’s really very simple. First, you have to stop thinking there is such a thing as a “picky” eater. Picky eating habits can’t be allowed or coddled! That being said, I don’t try and feed my kids seared halibut with sauted asparagus, either.

Read the rest here…

A letter of thanks to my 17 year old son for being the difficult, challenging, delinquent teenager he has been. If he hadn’t been so difficult, I wouldn’t find parenting the rest of my children so easy! He taught me perspective, something I wish I had learned when he was much younger.

http://parentingsquad.com/a-letter-of-thanks-to-my-teenage-son-for-teaching-me-perspective-in-childrearing

In 5th and 6th grade, I wanted nothing more than to be like Jeanna Penn. She was my idol. She was cool, confident, had all the right clothes — and everyone liked her. She was a straight-A student and an athlete.

I wanted nothing more than for her to like me and to be included in her group…I mean, clique.

She hated me. And it wasn’t just the kind of hate that leads one to ignore someone or not include them in a party. It was visceral hate. The kind that led her to taunt me relentlessly in front of people who dared to be my friends and threaten to beat me up after school. She even “set up” a fight and invited me to be beaten senseless in front of the rest of the fifth grade. She might very well have beaten me up that day…we’ll never know, because I never showed up for the fight in question. I walked home a different way.

Read more here:
http://parentingsquad.com/when-is-it-ok-to-bully-a-bully

OK – here’s the thing. I was homeless once. I’m not now, but could easily be again, I suppose…these days I think almost anyone could. For all those who thought I became a millionaire after writing books – so not true! We live paycheck to paycheck – just like most people.

Because I do a lot of speaking at events for the poor and homeless, I often get a lot of questions about the logistics of being homeless. How did I do things? How did I shower? How did we eat? How did we make it through?

The first thing you have to know about being homeless is this: It’s not the end of the world. No, really. It’s really terrible. Especially if you are in an unsafe situation…but it’s not the end. So, giving up and giving into hopelessness is not the way to go! The most important thing you can do when you are about to be homeless or are homeless is accept the situation for what it is.

Accept that you don’t have a place to live. Deferring the thought – or drinking your way through it – is not going to get you a place to live.

Now, when I first realized that I was going to spend an undetermined amount of time sleeping in my car, I took stock. What did I have? Did I need blankets or a pot to cook on or a lighter? It’s important to rid yourself of the crap that isn’t useful – I carried around a TV set for months…I still have no idea why.

Find your local social services office and apply for every type of emergency help you can get. If you are homeless, they can’t deny you food stamps, for example. I didn’t know this – and because they said I made too much money, I didn’t get them.

Talk to other homeless people. They will know where the food pantries, medical clinics, shelters and other helpful places are. I didn’t do this – I wish I had.

Truck stops are fantastic. You can get a shower and sometimes even rest for a bit in the lounge. Libraries and laundromats are also excellent, entertaining and warm.

If you can’t find a regular job, consider doing odd jobs…like lawn mowing or snow shoveling. You’d be amazed at how innovative you can be when you need cash.

Don’t be a victim. I know this is hard. And I certainly had my moments of self-pity…but letting that self-pity in can overwhelm you and take you to a dark place that’s hard to come out of.

Try to be “normal.” Well, at least as normal as possible. I used to take the kids for walks to the park and beach, to the library’s story time and even out for ice cream (once in a while). I tried very hard to pretend that we were just a normal mom and kids…you know what they say – “Fake it til you make it.”

Keep trying. At some point, you are going to want to give up. You are going to be sick of filling out forms, looking for a job or house or both and just plain sick of it. Don’t stop. In this you cannot fail. You must keep working to make your life what you want it to be.

A new post up at ParentingSquad.com

I recently tried to work outside of our home part-time. Yeah, that didn’t work. As I sit here writing this, my 11-year-old, who is homeschooling again is doing his language arts, my two-year-old is playing with the noisiest toys we own, my four-year-old is whining about not being allowed to play with a video game (he’s quite persistent) and I’m nursing the 3 month old.

Every morning I wake up at 5 am and feed the baby while trying to get a little cleaning done before everyone else wakes up. I also drink a bunch of coffee. At 6 am I wake up my 13-year-old (Alex) and 16-year-old (Lydia) for school.

By 6:30, Lydia needs to be out the door to take the city bus to her high school across town. She’s good at taking care of everything herself, so she’s pretty low-maintenance in the morning…also, not very chatty!

Read the rest here: http://parentingsquad.com/life-with-lots-of-kids

Now up at ParentingSquad.com:

For years, I have been the quintessential homeschooling mom. At one point I homeschooled a high schooler, a middle schooler, a third grader and a preschooler — with another in high school, a toddler and another on the way. I had all of the books (still do). I have textbooks and software and workbooks and worksheets and lapbooks and ebooks. You name it — if it has to do with homeschooling, I own it.

I was a homeschooling junkie and a guru all at the same time. I attended classes (yes there are CLASSES to teach you how to homeschool), wrote articles on the virtues of homeschooling, bought planners, joined homeschool groups, went to conferences — spoke at conferences and even looked to the Duggars for homeschool advice! And now?

Well, this year, for the first time in at least 10 years, all of my children are going to public school. All of them — except the two-year-old and the newborn. Even my four-year-old is going to 4K for half the day.

read the rest here: http://parentingsquad.com/a-homeschooling-guru-sends-her-kids-to-public-school

An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, “Only a little while.”

The American then asked him why didn’t he stay out longer and catch more fish. The Mexican replied that he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs. The American then asked, “But what do you do with the rest of your time?”

The Mexican fisherman said, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siestas with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine, and play guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life, senor.”

The American scoffed, “I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from the bigger boat, you could buy several boats; eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing, and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually New York City, where you will run your expanding enterprise.”

The Mexican fisherman asked, “But, how long will this all take?”

To which the American replied, “15 – 20 years.”

“But what then?” asked the Mexican.

The American laughed and said, “That’s the best part. When the time is right you would sell your company stock to the public and become very rich; you would make millions!”

“Millions – then what, senor?”

The American said, “Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siestas with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.”

Author Unknown

I have given birth to seven children. All but one was completely natural and drug-free. My first time was an awful experience with an OB-Gyn who yelled at me throughout the whole birth and had me flat on my back, pushing up into the air. I was 19 and really quite dumb…I mean naïve about the whole thing. I had gone to childbirth education classes, but when you don’t know what to expect and when you can’t yet fathom the kind of pain you’ll be in, you relent to almost anything the doctor says. No wonder so many women end up with c-sections.

By the time I was pregnant with my second child, I was much smarter. Rather than rely on the good old, “What to Expect When You’re Expecting,” medical model for pregnancy and birth, I had found Ina May Gaskin and Spiritual Midwifery. Before my first birth, I didn’t even know there was such a thing as a Certified Nurse Midwife. I thought midwives were from the Civil War era and didn’t know they were still “legal.”

Read more here: http://parentingsquad.com/natural-childbirth-have-i-been-duped